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 Staff Purple 

In the beginning times, all was well. Purple reigned supreme in Sacramento. Sadly, as time passed, people forgot their allegiance to purple and strayed, erroneously thinking other colors offered a better choice. The following is a scientific analysis of what each color actually means.

Purple

* Prized by royal courts in the Middle Ages and Renaissance. Worn by powerful kings, clergy and the richest merchants. Still the color of the Sacramento Kings today
* Jimi Hendrix loved it so much, he wrote a song about it
* Color of the Sacramento Sports Commission
* No word rhymes with purple - showing its obvious superiority

Blue 

* Needs to combine with red to be as great as purple
* Color of choking, a synonym for doing terribly in a competition
* Associated with sadness in music
* Can't even spell itself correctly when used with cheese or salad dressing. What is this, France?

Orange

* An icon of Florida. This is California
* The weaker Crush
* Can't decide if it's a color, flavor or fruit
* Bonus points for at least trying to be as great as purple by being impossible to rhyme with anything 

Red

* Needs to combine with blue to be as good as purple
* It's the color of awards for second place
* Communism
* Fades quicker than any other color

Green

* The color of envy
* The color of bananas when they aren't yet ready to do the one job they have
* The color of the trendy healthy juices and smoothies nobody actually likes
* Pretends it's the color of money, but actually isn't. Seriously, take out your wallet and check

Yellow

Click here to see yellow in action 

purple 

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